Monday, 1 October 2018



TANVIR Sports / TANVIR Humour


If we look at the sporting scene in 2014, it was definitely action packed but the Sochi winter Olympics, Football world cup in Brazil and the female and male Hockey world cups held in Netherlands stand out as outstanding and extraordinary. I have already written about the Sochi winter Olympics and the propaganda preceding it. Now is the time for Football and Hockey.

Though both the Hockey world cup and Football world cups have passed, months before but both were such scintillating display of artistry, player skills, and teamwork and of course, arrangement that they still lingers in our memory.

I will take Football world cup first, even though it ended later. It looked pretty arranged to me with Brazil being good hosts and their Samba girls providing all the spice needed for such an arrangement and event.

But, my narrative begins with the final match of the Football world cup 2014 between Argentina and Germany, which Germany won by one goal. Well the football may be round but the figure that dominated the football world cup final 2014 was the rectangular or cuboid figure german goalkeeper.

Argentina looked the better team and had more and better goal scoring opportunities than Germany. We must also remember that the football goal is rectangular in outline. But, the German goalkeeper’s rectangular figure so snugly fit into the German goal that the Argentine players could not find any opening to score a goal. Not that he did not give any opportunities but the times he got a bit deflated, the sound was muffled by the noisy German fans and the full stadium. This loss of opportunity profit making on part of the Argentine attacking line left the Argentine football team and fans quite deflated in the end.

But, I must add that the inflated presence of german goalkeeper in the German goal was further boosted by a very heavy purse he was carrying. By some accounts, it carried in excess of 100 million Euros. I think considering the poor shape the Argentine economy is in, it acted as an additional incentive for the Argentine forwards not to score.

Many spectators in the stadium and millions of viewers on television wondered why the Argentine players could not score even after beating the German goalkeeper and having a seemingly empty goal in front of them. I must inform such ignorant and watsonian observation spectators and viewers that the German goal throughout the match was filled by the “sac of potatoes” presence of German goalkeeper. Hence, Argentine players could not score.
But equally its possible that the Argentine players saw only bag of potatoes in the German goal and in the dire straits Argentine economy is, thought that a bag of potatoes at the end of the match is better than the utterly worthless Football world cup. I think, such considerations prevented the Argentine players from scoring and who can blame them for this.

 In addition, we must understand that the old rectangular figure of german goalkeeper in the German goal isn’t very attractive. So, instead of running towards the German goal, most of the time they were seen running away from it.
I wonder the case if the German goal was manned by a german beauty like Steffi Graf when she was 16. She was tall, sexy, beautiful and sweet also. We all remember her legs, don’t we? Well, that certainly would have spurred the Argentine players towards the German goal. But, why just Steffi Graf, the German female hockey team has lots of beautiful attractive players and considering that they were eliminated pretty early in the Hockey world cup at The Hague, one of those beauties would definitely would have made an impression in this Football world cup final. Just run your imagination wild. Imagine that instead of the rectangular figure of german goalkeeper in the German goal, one of the beautiful German female hockey players was there. Let’s put miniskirt on her, let’s also put a sleeveless blouse on her. No shirt or T-shirt is required.

Well, in such a scenario, the Argentine players would have run wild towards the German goal. Also, a shapely German beauty is more likely to give some space between her legs to score a goal than the bag of Potatoes german goalkeeper. Also, I think german goalkeeper’s figure is not fully rectangular, there is some space on either side of his head to score a goal. But, such was the brilliance and safe hands of German goalkeeper Manuel Neuer that whenever Argentina attacked, he tightly wound his hands around his neck, closing all gaps and preventing Argentina from scoring.

But I wonder if Manuel Neuer had wound his hands a bit more tightly around his own neck, it would have been a different story altogether. In the end, his hands around his own neck won him the best goalkeeper of the tournament award. Well who can blame him?

But, the rest of the Football world cup was very interesting, with lots of spectacular goals being scored, a total of 171 goals. I think the results of following my suggestions as given by me in “The coming sporting scene is exciting” were so dramatic, with so many goals being scored and Spain being eliminated that the organizers got scared halfway in the pool stage, otherwise lot more goals could have been scored and more dramatic results would have followed.

The Brazil crowd boosted the Brazil football team to win over Colombia. If Colombia had won that match against Brazil, and it came very close on many occasions, in my estimation, it would have been a Colombia Argentina final.

France, Holland and Costa Rica also did well in this world cup with Holland beating Brazil for the third position.

Of the individual players, though Lionel Messi dazzled in this world cup but failed to score that all-important goal in the finals, which would have won his team the World cup. Christian Ronaldo also showed why he so highly paid at the club level but his team lacked necessary teamwork to derive further benefits from him.

But James Rodriguez was the most dazzling player of the tournament and scored 6 goals. If his team had got past Brazil, he would have dazzled even more and might have scored more goals. He has got the skills and necessary temperament to score in big matches and tournaments.

Overall, this world cup was very entertaining and very good to watch.

Now I come to the male Hockey. In my opinion, the Hockey world cup was far less arranged. But it looked like the early exit of Germany both from female and male Hockey world cups was prearranged for the eventual triumph of Germany in the Football world cup.

Male Hockey saw some dazzling hockey in both the pools. Argentina in pool B was the most dazzling team apart from Australia who stopped Argentina in the semifinals to advance themselves into the finals. But, one thing which stood out for Argentina was that it was both solid in defense and attack. In the pool games they scored 15 goals and conceded just 5. This type of play with excellence in both defense and attack was what was eventually responsible for the early exit of Germany. In the same pool, New Zealand was another team, which was impressive, and the Argentina New Zealand match was a virtual Quarterfinal.

In pool A, Australia was in imperial form and scored 19 goals and conceded just one. They were excellent in attack and probably better in defense.
In the same pool, Belgium warmed up a bit late but played some dazzling hockey to score 17 goals and conceding 12. It was by very thin margin that England was able to edge out Belgium to enter the semifinals.

In the semifinals, Australia continued their marauding play to outplay Argentina 5 to 1 to enter the finals. In the other semifinal, which was a bit more sedate, Holland outplayed England but could score only one goal to enter the finals.

Such was the imperial and marauding form, shown by Australia in both the pool stage and semifinals that nobody except the most ardent fan of Holland doubted as to who will lift the world cup trophy. However, even they were shocked when Australia rampaged and destroyed a clueless Holland to win a one sided final 6 to 1.
Argentina rightfully claimed the third spot by defeating England 2 to 1.
As I had written earlier in “The coming sporting scene is exciting”, hockey has become a very fast game and it’s excellent to watch, more so on television with multiple replays and angles to see the goals and misses. This world cup was at its dazzling best.
But, like other things good, the format of hockey can be made more exciting. Instead of two pools, we can have 4 and more teams can qualify to play in the world cup. This will widen the reach of hockey and will make the competition even more exciting.

If the Hockey federation can arrange for Astroturf in countries which cannot afford them, hockey can become even more popular, because its very fast and very goal scoring and is just great to watch on television.

This year, the female and male hockey world cups were held simultaneously in the Hague in Netherlands. The female pool matches were not shown in India. What a pity!

Female hockey has become very fast and it would have been a treat if both the female and male hockey matches were shown on television. If the matches coincide, instead of blacking all female matches, it should be left at the discretion of the audience to decide, which of the matches to watch. There are so many beautiful hockey players that to have 22 damsels fighting hockey on the field is a visual delight. Unfortunately, for us, some one in the Hockey federation, probably someone with a homosexual agenda decided not to show female hockey pool matches.
I think homosexual propaganda runs deep. They do not want us to see the milky white thighs and legs and arms of the female players but to spread homosexuality, they expose us to the beefy muscular arms, legs, and whatever of the sleeveless Australian, New Zealand etc players. I qualify this as discrimination against straight people and discrimination against female hockey and female hockey players and female sports and female sports players, female, and femininity.
I protest strongly and condemn this cruel act of depriving straight males like me the luxury and the opportunity to see all those beautiful hockey players at work. We can have their photographs. But the fluid motion of these female hockey players along with their dazzling artistry cannot be matched by photographs.

The only way to enjoy this fluid, musical, sensuous and sexual dance of the female hockey players is too see them perform live, even on television, with plenty of close ups etc. This is good for the game.

The Organizers of the game did give us the finals live. The Holland girls were simply superb in attack. They were tall, very fast and just didn’t allow Australia enough opportunities to attack. Holland managed to score twice in the first half, through captain Maartje Peumen and now retired Kim Lammers, who was playing in her 200th and final match. Maartje Peumen scored 7 goals in the tournament to be declared the Hero top scorer of the tournament. Ellen Hoog of Holland was named the Rababock player of the tournament. That both these players are from Holland, testifies to their skills and supremacy.
I must also admit that Australia female hockey players were compact, very pretty but in this tournament could not match the attacking qualities of the Dutch female hockey team.
But it was a superb hockey tournament

It was a superb year for sports!

Have a nice day!


All Rights Tanvir Nebuchadnezar

No comments:

Post a comment